Archive for February, 2012

104 Year Old Woman Interview

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A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: “And what do you think is
the best thing about being 104?” the reporter asked.

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Reward for goodness

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Three men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates.

The Lord spoke unto them saying, “I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you.

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A forester and lawyer

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A forester and a lawyer were in car accident and showed up at the pearly gates together.

St. Peter greets them at the pearly gates and takes them to the homeswhere they will spend all of eternity. They get into St. Peter’s holy vehicle and head on down a gold road, which turns into a platinum road, which turns onto an even grander road paved with diamonds, to a huge mansion where St. Peter turns to the lawyer and says, here is your home for the rest of eternity, enjoy! And if there is anything you need, just let me know.

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Dealing with a lawyer

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A new York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him “What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?” The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, “A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street.” Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true.

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Each man gives a story

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Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, “Heaven’s getting pretty close to full today, and I’ve been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what’s your story?”

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Try to explain women

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A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions.

“Sure,” GOD says, “Go right ahead”.

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Idiot

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Idiot (id-ee-it) n.- One who disagrees with you.


How to keep

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How to keep an idiot entertained *press down*

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I met a boy

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I met a boy in the states i give him my hart he gave me aids.


5 differences between Turkish en ET

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5 differences between Turkish en ET: ET looked better, ET learned English, ET came alone, ET had his own bike and wanted to go home!


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